Friday, November 19, 2010
For many fêtes
As a recently married diva, I've been thinking a lot about preparing for marriage. What must one do after becoming betrothed? Is it important to exhaust the interests that might not fit nicely in your marriage?
The answer, for the most part, is an unequivocal no! Marriage may be about compromise (I should know I've been married for 27 days!), but it's not about compromising yourself.
There are some exceptions...
Here are a few important questions that you should ask yourself before getting hitched:
1. Have I exhausted my party self? If you, dear friends, are more interested in trysts in St. Barts with strangers than nights in like this - I suggest you run! Run far away from any marriage prospects. It's for your own good.
2. Have I exhausted my wanderlust self? If not, does my partner harbor the same feelings? If you yearn for cultural excursions abroad and your partner thinks a visit to the Upper East Side is traveling - I suggest you stop, drop, and roll to the nearest airport. When you get there buy a one-way ticket to anywhere but marriageville and have a safe trip.
3. Have I exhausted my need for speedy gratification with members of the opposite sex (who are not my partner) self? Yup I said it! I'm a modern woman and feel perfectly comfortable noting that people like to flirt, court, and rendezvous with the opposite sex. It's in our nature pumpkins.
4. Have I exhausted my take the job in Timbuktu self? If you dream of 2-year stints healing the world in someplace other than home - you have to discuss this upfront. Perhaps you will learn that your mate has the same dreams. Now you can you fulfill your dreams and save the gorillas together! 1...2...3...awwwwww how romantic?
5. Have I exhausted my need to get my partner to wear a belt that matches his shoes self? When my Husband and I get ready to go out, I'm the first to try and get his getup to match my own. But I still accept him just the way he is, even if he wears a tweed jacket and I wear a high-waisted leather skirt with all the frills.
Ask yourself these question before tying the knot and you run little risk that let these"selves" tug at you (and tug at you), until you become filled with resentment and feel like retreating.
Here is to my 27th day of marriage and to never exhausting my be myself self!